Showing posts with label st. patrick's day. Show all posts
Showing posts with label st. patrick's day. Show all posts

3.17.2011

March Madness Is Turning Out To Include More Than Just College Basketball

In what could be considered the second National Sports holiday of the year, first being the Super Bowl, the NCAA Tournament officially started today. In all we have 16 games that are played on both Thursday and Friday and then reduced in half hereinafter. For me, this is personally my favorite day of the year. I always get that false hope of getting a perfect bracket and winning shit tons of money. But since I have a pretty tight grasp on all things sports, my bracket always gets fucked up around 5:00 pm Thursday. But it's the excitement of the games that gets my blood boiling. However, this tournament start date also marked St. Patrick's Day, the alcoholic's holiday. How elegant.
This year March 17 turned out to be incredible in more ones than one. I got to lay in bed all day and watch every single game. I didn't get to drink in the fuckin' awesome 60 degree weather. My amigos from college aren't even in the country anymore. And I kept seeing commercials for Buffalo Wild Wings. It is easily the greatest chain restaurant in the United States with the most delicious wing sauces. It actually pained me to sit and watch these commercials come one after the other. It's almost as if I punished someone and this was my payback. But I didn't. I'm a good person.
(How fuckin' flashy is this? Literally.)

Why do people celebrate St. Patrick's Day? I wrote earlier this month about how I was being a drunkard all day celebrating this joyous holiday, but for what reason? My religious beliefs are null-and-void, my nationality is not Irish (it's worse), and I hate the color green. My friend is kind of lucky that he is colorblind because I think green is one of the colors he can't see. It comes out brown or something. Green is such a stupid color. I don't like anything green. And what's the deal with corned beef and sauerkraut? My mom was pushing that shit all day on me. I didn't become Jewish today, why would I want that stuff? I just don't get it, but like I said, it's just an excuse for Americans to get drunk. That's fine.

To also go along with the theme, the disaster in Japan is getting worse by the day. My uncle is terrified that those nuclear reactors are going to explode, if they haven't already, and has been drinking iodized salt water to counter it. If you are like me and have no idea why he was doing it, the reason is simple. Iodine is a chemical solution that helps prevent radioactive materials from entering into the thyroid gland. If it does enter, it could become cancerous. I think his strategy is a little pre-emptive because we don't even know for sure that those nuclear materials will even make it here. This is where the madness is really occurring.

I read an article today in between games that warned of the dangers of taking potassium iodine, KI, as a preventative measure as opposed to a necessary one. They sell it in pills over-the-counter in the drug stores around the country, but due to the panic, has been sold out since late last week. It makes me nervous because maybe these people know something that I don't know. Or they are overreacting for the time being. Who's to say? Not me. You have to imagine that we aren't going to hear all the truths over the media, but I'd hope they'd tell us if our lives/health was at serious risk. But that's enough about that.

March should be a month that focuses on the upcoming warm-ish weather. The start of baseball and college basketball at it's finest. I'm sure when the time comes around, I'll be writing about Opening Day 2011. But what I hate most about March is the onslaught of allergies that attack me. I wish my mom wasn't such a dweeb and had an impenetrable immune system? that would prevent my body from feeling like shit for a week or two. Sore throats are the worst, but trying to go to sleep with a clogged nose isn't very thrilling either. And then you wake up with a dry mouth because you're breathing through it like an asshole. Atrocious. So I actually kind of hate March for that reason. I'm sorry I wasn't funny today. Or any other day for that matter. I can't help that "I'm better than you."

3.03.2011

St. Patrick's Day Has Come Early. Why America Drinks For No Reason

March 17 is a "national" holiday. I say "national" because people still have work on it, but it's considered to be something that everyone celebrates in some regard. It is on this day that we all become Irish. Looking back at what I was taught growing up, St. Patrick's Day was a day to celebrate an Irishmen who lifted the boundaries on the Catholic teaching and became an icon of sorts. So we celebrate in America because we are all Catholic? No, I'm mistaken. We celebrate it because we are all Irish. Nope, that doesn't sound right either. The real reason we celebrate it is because Americans are alcoholics and find it necessary to get hammered for no real reason.

Think about it. There appears to be one day in every month that we find a reason to get fucked up. In January, we have Martin Luther King Jr. Day, February has the Super Bowl, March has St. Patty's, April has my birthday, May has Cinco de Mayo (Mexican Independence), June has Flag Day, July has Independence Day, August has the end of summer day somewhere in there, September has Labor Day, October has Halloween, November has Thanksgiving, and December has Christmas or Hanukkah. There you have it. A run-down of all the reasons we find to drink as a country. Why?

Alcoholism. Mitch Hedburg once said, "Alcoholism is the only disease you can get yelled at for having." But let's be honest with ourselves. Deep down we are all a little bit alcoholics. Who's to say that a glass of wine or 2 with dinner is wrong? Or watching Legends of the Hidden Temple and having a drink every time Kirk Fogg touches a kid. It's okay to have a drinking problem, as long as you don't drive or beat the shit out of your partner, Chris Brown. Life presents some very difficult challenges and stresses, and sometimes the only way to alleviate it is with a drink. But you shouldn't get carried away.


Beerfest is a film that celebrates the kookiness and spontaneity of drinking. Games and chugging contests. What isn't fun about drinking? Nothing. Everything is fun. You get to make excuses for making out with ugly people or doing worse things. You get to throw up and/or dry-heave for a solid 5-10 minute ab workout. Heck, you can even find a reason to sleep-in the whole next day. Of course we find days to drink. Everything about it is great. Everything that is but the almighty hangover. How some freakshows never end up with one is beyond me, but maybe, just maybe one day, I'll figure out the mystery to end the hangover. It's more important than world hunger, in my opinion.

This weekend is going to be a real special one for me. I'm going to see some friends from college for the first time since I left their beautiful faces in May. Sometimes it's hard for me to imagine that it was that long ago. But time flies when you're unemployed and living at home. So I would like to take this time to thank Mr. St. Patrick for finding three-leaf-clovers and keeping the tradition of Catholicism alive and prevalent. Because without you Patty, us Americans would have to find another reason to get tanked. But I won't need another reason to tell you, "I am better than you."



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